Post 51:
“Handyman”

From 13-Year-Old Anne’s Journal —

February 14 — EXCELLENT

“A handyman named Chris comes along. He’s a good man and Mary suspects something between him & Ma. (Charles is gone.) Mary yells at him and tells him to leave. Then they catch him and apologize. He says “Maybe I’ll go & find “a woman like your Ma.”

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From Tracy —

Every now and then I get an episode totally wrong. In this case I actually remember Ma slapping Mary for being a bitch. But that never happened — in any episode of Little House ever. Maybe I wanted to slap Mary. Because she is definitely not her best self in this episode and it’s shocking to see.

The episode starts off in the usual way. Pa promises Ma a new kitchen, cuts a freakin’ hole in the side of the house and then boogies for a better job. He doesn’t even put a tarp up first. The next thing you know there’s a cow in the kitchen and then it’s raining. I’m amazed by how many times Caroline has every right to kill Charles and doesn’t.

But let’s move on to the really good part. The Handyman. Who comes up prettily whistling and gets right on with the job. Swoon! I have had my share of crushes on handymen. Sometimes they weren’t even hunky. But a guy who’s good around the house is a sexy specimen indeed. Even goodness incarnate — Caroline — can’t keep her eyes from glittering with more than a little lust.

And let’s face it, when your handyman is Gil Gerard aka Funkin‘ Buck Rogers how are you going to resist? Lord. Have. Mercy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fqjC_72okOA

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From Anne —

Yeah, where’s Reverend Alden when you need to stop yourself from sinning?

If Sylvia gets the award for the most unsavory LHOP episode … The Handyman is the most savory!  I like how Gil Gerard states that he “sleeps wherever he finds himself.” And that he does whatever he can to “make the nights a little shorter.”  And he can’t deny it when (agree with you, Trace) shrill, righteous Mary accuses: “You love my mother, don’t you?” We know he loves her flowing hair, since he says it three times…

I think the Handyman-Ma chemistry is actually based an S&M vibe! Ma’s got a dominatrix streak that she doesn’t get to use with Charles, who’s pretty much always in charge.  “Do as I say!” Caroline tells the Handyman. “Don’t argue with me!” she says when nursing his wound.

For some unknown reason, the Handyman has low self-esteem: “Who’d want to settle down with me, anyway?” he asks passive-aggressively, just before saving Caroline from falling in the creek. Who wouldn’t want to settle down with Gil Gerard?

Thanks for that Buck Rogers tight pants pic, Tracy. It was 1977, and Gerard was among the hottest of the hot at the time, alongside John Travolta and Burt Reynolds.  OMG, imagine them popping up on the prairie…